Kara Dennison
November 21, 2021 
As we’ve discussed before, all dogs are equal best. Which means our dogs (and yours) are already the best. That said, once in a while we see anime dogs (also the best) do something really cool. And we can’t help but think it’d be pretty cool if we could teach those tricks to our pups. You know, if a lot of those tricks weren’t outright impossible. But we’ve got can-do attitudes and lots of time on our hands.
Here are three cartoon pooches with talents we really wish we could transfer to our own. Have you had any luck training yours similarly? And if so, could you slide us some pointers?
Ein – Hacking the Mainframe
Long the king of the anime dogs, the goodest boy in space is also the king of computers. Datadog Ein from Cowboy Bebop can do just about anything you need, and a few things you don’t. He can navigate his way through the outerweb with ease. And in the Netflix series, we see him crack an impressive digital lock to flee his carrier.
Frankly, we’d settle for something a lot lower level. Like, say, figuring out whether our Internet outage is broad or just needs a router reset. Or answering questions over the phone for our parents. Maybe a second for co-op games on the side, if he behaves.
Sadaharu – Getting Big
Anime dogs come in all shapes and sizes — including huge. Sadaharu from Gintama, for example, is a whole lot of huggable pup even on a normal day. But feet him strawberry milk, and he gets even bigger. And more monstrous. But still a good boy, obviously.
So wait… are we saying we’d like to turn our dogs into huge monsters with treats? No, of course not. Just the huge part. After all, the only thing better than a dog is more dog. That said, our dogs might like feeling big and powerful when they chase squirrels. So you know what? Sure. Big monster it is.
Romero – ???
Good anime dogs don’t die; they just become good zombie dogs. Romero, the fluffy mascot of ZOMBIE LAND SAGA, doesn’t let a little thing like undeath get him down. He’s still an active pup, and has the ability to… uh. Well, let’s see. He can turn big and scary. Unless he’s turning small and cute, and Big Scary Romero is the real Romero.
He can also manage to make just about anything he does adorable, when in point of fact these adorable things would not go so well for a mere mortal pup. If nothing else, never having to worry about our pups getting hurt would be nice. But… at what cost?
So far, we’re struggling with basics like “sit” and “stay.” But if we manage to train our dogs to grow huge and fight for our honor, we’ll let you know.
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